Transvestia

I was the oldest grandchild on my mother's side of the family. So of course, I was the apple of my grand- parent's eyes. Strict parental control developed me into a "nice boy", and made my grandparents proud.

I always stood at the head of my and read avidly. I read everything newspapers and mail order catalogs. always registered a special appeal.

class in school

books, magazines, Women's fashions

Shirley Temple is just about my age, and she was in her heyday as a child movie star when I was young. My parents never took me to a movie, but I used to re- ad about Shirley in the newspapers and admire her pic- tures. How I envied her! I used to have dreams at night about having long golden curls and silk dresses just like Shirley. Sometimes I even dreamed of being abducted and changed physically into a beautiful little girl.

During high school days I found that my mother's clothes fit me. I began to enjoy ecstatic moments locked in my room and trying on some of her lingerie and dresses. My best opportunities for this came on the rare occasions when I was home from school, and con- fined to bed with flu or a bad cold.

My sister and brother would be in school, my father outside working, and my mother busy with her household chores downstairs. Then I would sneak into my mother's room, pick out her best panties, slip, bra, and perhaps a dress and return to my room. No matter how ill I was the ecstasy of femme dressing made me forget all about physical discomforts for the moment.

At times the idea of a sex conversion operation has had great appeal for me. In the past I have rationalized this desire away by concluding that circumstances were not in my favor. I didn't want to saddle my parents and grandparents with shock and possible shame which would result. After I became married, I still had these thoughts of femmasculation occasionally. Then it became con- venient to mentally blame love of my wife for holding me back.

I am not the type of person who would be satisfied

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